


To Be Whole

by PhenixFleur



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Fluff and Angst, Fusion, Gen, Introspection, Platonic Female/Female Relationships, friendshipping, spoilers for recent Stevenbomb
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-24
Updated: 2015-07-24
Packaged: 2018-04-11 02:01:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,158
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4416782
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PhenixFleur/pseuds/PhenixFleur
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Pearl reflects on her damaged relationship with Garnet, and Amethyst attempts to comfort her.</p>
            </blockquote>





	To Be Whole

**Author's Note:**

  * For [dewdrop721](https://archiveofourown.org/users/dewdrop721/gifts).



> I'm guessing everyone's seen the Sardonyx episodes, but if not part of this won't make sense. Relationship between Pearl and Amethyst is meant to be platonic, but if you ship it, go right ahead. : )
> 
> There needs to be more Opal. She's such a serene, graceful fusion that she says a lot about how Pearl and Amethyst's personalities complete each other.

Pearl had seen many moons over the course of her existence. The one that drifted languidly around Earth wasn’t particularly remarkable, but she’d come to like it over the thousands of years of watching it wax and wane. The shadows that darkened its surface had rather lovely names: _Mare Serenitatis_ , the sea of serenity.  _Mare Tranquillitatis_ , the sea of tranquility. The sea of clouds, of moisture, of showers, of rain. 

It was the perfect moon to cry under, leaning with her back against one of the stone fingers on the temple’s remaining hand with her knees tucked beneath her chin. 

She’d exhausted her tears, for the most part, leaving nothing but a hollow point in her chest that threatened to swallow her whole. 

“ _You **tricked**  me._”

The words continued to echo in her head, even now with Garnet, Steven and Greg gone for the moment on some likely inane venture; they’d been underlaid with a level of disbelief and disappointment that she’d rarely seen directed at Amethyst or herself. She didn’t blame Garnet - it was an admittedly awful thing to do, but nothing could compare to the feeling of being  _whole_ again. Garnet didn’t understand. How could she? But Pearl didn’t blame her. There was no one to blame but herself.

The warp pad gleamed for a few seconds, yielding an uncharacteristically glum Amethyst. Pearl didn’t blame her, either. It couldn’t have lasted forever.

She folded in on herself more as Amethyst walked over and sat down next to her, laying a hand on her shoulder. “How are you holding up?” Her brash tone was much softer than Pearl was used to, and she was grateful for that. She lifted her head ever so slightly, glancing over at her fellow Gem before looking away again.

“She’s never given me the silent treatment this long before,” Pearl muttered, heaving a sigh that caused the hollow to flare up once more. “Granted, I’ve never had a transgression of this level of severity-”

“No, I get it,” Amethyst interrupted. Pearl wasn’t the cuddliest of Gems; the most physical contact she’d ever bothered with outside of fusion involved Rose Quartz, but that wasn’t something she wanted to think about at the moment. Still, she appreciated the gesture when Amethyst scooted closer, resting her head on her shoulder. “I totally get it.”

Pearl looked down at the fluffy lavender head pressed up against her arm. Sometimes she forgot how different Amethyst was from the other Homeworld Gems she’d known. She possessed more human traits than she and Garnet put together, and  was also far more prone to actually deriving comfort from hugs and company - something Steven was more than happy to provide on a pretty consistent basis. “Thanks. For sticking up for me back there.” She paused for a minute, deliberating over her words before speaking them. “I don’t deserve it.”

Amethyst groaned in frustration, sitting up and leaning over to grab her hand. “No, Pearl,  _I get it._ ” Her eyes met Pearl’s, conveying all of the words that she didn’t know how to say and that Pearl  _couldn’t_  say. “I understand why you did it." 

Soft, gentle smiles weren’t Amethyst’s thing, so Pearl was a bit taken aback when the smaller Gem’s expression relaxed into one. "I feel that way a lot of the time, too.”

The expression, the emotion behind them, and everything else unbalanced the levee and sent it crashing down; Pearl leaned forward and embraced Amethyst, tears dampening her hair. Amethyst didn’t complain about her ‘do, simply returning the embrace and allowing Pearl to cry it out for a few minutes before letting go and pressing her back against the stone miserably. “I miss her,” she sniffled, no longer concerned with her image. “I miss her so much.”

The  _her_  in question didn’t have to be specified, and Amethyst nodded in agreement. “Yeah. Me too.”

“I never knew what it felt like to be alone until she wasn’t there.”  _And I would do anything to not have to feel that anymore._

The two sat there for a moment, with nothing but the  _shhh_  of the waves beneath the ledge and Pearl’s sniffling to break the silence. Finally Amethyst stood up, extending her hand to Pearl, who looked up at her, confused by the gesture. “What are you-”

Amethyst’s usual vibrancy lit up her face again. “Let’s be Opal." 

Just the thought of fusion turned Pearl’s stomach for the first time in as long as she could remember. "I…I don’t think I should-”

The lavender Gem seized her arm, tugging her to her feet. “Come on, it’s just us here. I’ll even do your dumb dance with you,” she teased.

Despite her dejection, Pearl couldn’t help but smile at her enthusiasm for a few seconds before realizing what she’d said. “It’s not dumb!” She snapped, rolling her eyes when Amethyst grinned at her reaction. “Controlled, graceful movement is…” she trailed off. Amethyst stared at her, invitingly, offering her a brief reprieve from her self-imposed isolation. 

“You’re gonna have to show me how, though.” Amethyst tossed her hair over her shoulder. “You know this slow stuff isn’t my jam.”

Pearl chewed on her lip anxiously, still mulling over the idea in her head. It wasn’t that she was afraid of fusion now…more so that the emptiness that loomed ahead after separation seemed almost unbearable. “I…”

“We might even like being together,” Amethyst sang, a tune that Pearl hadn’t heard for some time. It reminded her of better days. “And if you don’t, it won’t be forever.”

Pearl smiled, sighing in resignation. “That’s cheating, Amethyst. Alright. But just for a little while." 

Amethyst’s movements were, as always, somewhat artless compared to the pirouettes en pointe that encompassed Pearl’s usual style of dancing, but following Pearl’s lead the two managed a passable pas de deux atop the ledge. Pearl allowed her eyes to slip shut, tuning out the world around her, her memories, everything save for the sound of her partner’s voice. 

_I know what it’s like to feel alone. To feel unwanted. To let that sadness come to define you._

One turn after the other, hand in hand. Amethyst’s voice, in her head, and hers in Amethyst’s. 

_I know what it’s like to feel jealous. To feel envy. To feel guilt._

Their voices, no, their voice, one and the same.  _These things bind us together._

Completely unaware of the fusion’s success, Opal continued to dance beneath the pale light of the moon, high-spirited and graceful, tall and beautiful, peaceful and determined, upper arms held above her head in fifth position, lower braced beneath her sternum in first and her long flush of hair swishing against her calves. 

_So we never have to be completely alone. So our fragments create a whole._

Pearl and Amethyst remained fused for the rest of the night, dancing to the sound of the waves and the internal melody of, for once, being perfectly in sync.


End file.
